Don’t Look Back in Anger

Posted on 24. Jun, 2010 by in Guest posts

I know I am constantly going on about how your twenties are a great time to travel- well here is the flip-side of the coin. Today’s guest post comes from a thirty-something traveler, Scott Hartbeck, who has some regrets to get off his chest.

And so travel can wait. But can you really afford to make it wait?

When I wore a younger man’s shoes, which were flip-flops come to think of it, I didn’t worry about when I would get to travel and see the world. I knew it was something I would do eventually, but just never right then. I was content with earlier family vacations being the bulk of my travel resume as my 20′s approached. I certainly knew there was a great big world out there, and of course someday I would get to see all of it, but “traveling traveling” would be something I would do when I got older. In fact, it was one of the main things you did when you got older, wasn’t it? Traveling was a prize you were rewarded with later in life. After you had battled the business world for decades and emerged victorious with a home, family, and retirement fund, you were then free to move about the world.

Somewhere along the way though, I started to get a sick and sinking feeling that like many of the things in life that usually start with a “well, you know what they say”, this too may be a misguided mantra. The revelation started innocent enough. A travel documentary here, a spring break trip to Jamaica there, a bragging, backpacking, co-worker and suddenly it started to crystallize. Why would I wait to do these things when I can do them now? Now I am young. Now I am spry and energetic. Now there are no relationships, careers, and children to tie me down.

So what did I go out and do, you ask? Well, I did absolutely, positively, nothing at all.

I amazingly wandered down the path of wondering, wishing, and wanting to travel, but going nowhere. There was never a really good reason I suppose. I just simply didn’t hear my own advice loud enough to heed it. Weeks, months, and years went by and then it seemed the next time I looked up, I was about to turn 30. Only the sight of those two large numerals heading my way finally snapped me out of it and made me decide it was really time to do these things.

There were just a couple problems. First, I was now living on my own, so if I was going to take off to traverse the globe there was that little sticky thing of rent that needed to be dealt with. Also, with a few years under my belt at my job, would I just throw it all away for a backpack? Lastly, I was now a single parent of a basset hound and what would I do with her? I grappled with these factors and decided to move back home with the parents at 29, retire from the “two weeks of vacation a year” world and start traveling.


It started in 2006 with a two-week trip because I had to make it back for my best friend’s wedding. It then grew to seven weeks in 2007, but I couldn’t possibly stand going any longer than that without seeing my girlfriend. In 2008, with the pressure to move back out of my parents place growing, it became a two-week trip with a high school buddy who could only get two weeks vacation. As you see, it got complicated by waiting. Life got in the way. Now, I’m not positive the pastel-colored cliffs of Cinque Terre or the views from the Mountain Hostel in Gimmelwald would have taken my breath away any differently at 25. I’m also certain I held my own at Oktoberfest at age 30 and will run to catch a train with the best of them this fall. I just know it could have been a little better a little earlier.

As I sit near the close of my 32nd year and near the close of this cautionary tale, I have a three-week trip to Europe planned in September. This trek is to establish a small backpacking-oriented business. If plans proceed perfectly, this venture will afford me multiple trips in the future to far-flung global destinations. It is far from a sure thing though; the only sure thing is the fleeting benefits of twenty-something travel.

Scott Hartbeck is a thirty-something traveler trying to make up for lost time. When he’s not dreaming about the St. Louis Blues winning the Stanley Cup, trips to New Orleans, or his next bloody mary, he’s working on starting a brand of backpacking-themed apparel and his three-week jaunt to Europe this fall to launch it. Follow his progress @ The Shirt off My Backpack.

25 Responses to “Don’t Look Back in Anger”

  1. Kelsey

    24. Jun, 2010

    I saw your photo through the Mountain Hostel window before I read your post, and was almost positive that it was from Gimmelwald. Glad to see I was right! Great post.

    Reply to this comment

    • Scott

      25. Jun, 2010

      glad you liked the post. Yeah, you have to take the obligatory “out the window shot” when you have a view like that. When were you there?
      I was there in Sep ’07 and ’08.

      Scott

      Reply to this comment

  2. Farnoosh

    24. Jun, 2010

    I can relate to this on so many levels. The travel bug did not get me til I was in my 20s but I started to act in my late twenties and well, I have yet to stop. My husband and I love but love to travel and I am sick of everyone asking when we are going to stop going places – you know, the type of people who go to the beach or mountain once a year and call that a “vacation”! I have to tell you though, 30s are the best, and 20s are way over-rated, and even they were good. I think we get better with age, and so long as we are viciously healthy, nothing can keep us back and yes, I also think we enjoy certain things better in our 30s – at least for me anyway. So toss regret and anger aside and just find a way to keep traveling now!
    Thank you for a great post!

    Reply to this comment

    • Scott

      25. Jun, 2010

      glad you enjoyed the post! You are right, Some things do indeed get better with age and despite the way the post possibly comes off, I am not angry at all. I love the chance I have before me and know that I am lucky that I atleast stopped snoozing before it truly was too late.

      Safe Travels!

      Scott

      Reply to this comment

  3. ayngelina

    24. Jun, 2010

    So timely, I woke up today and thought about my first major solo trip. It was 10 years ago, I was 23, and I moved to the Philippines. Ten years later I’m taking a year off to travel and somethings have changed but a lot remains the same.

    It’s easy to go when you’re young because you don’t have much to leave, congratulations for making the decision when you realized you still don’t have much to lose.

    Reply to this comment

  4. Andrew

    25. Jun, 2010

    Welcome (back) to the traveling world. It seems like you did travel more than most. Regrets aren’t really that helpful other than to force you to make the better decision in the future.
    It can be really awesome in both your 20s and your 30s. At 29 I moved to Europe, and although I’m back into the work with vacation mode, 5 weeks a year and all of europe at my doorstep helps make that an easier place to be.

    Reply to this comment

  5. MaryAnne

    25. Jun, 2010

    I’ve been travelling since I was 19 and I’m (oh god) nearly 36 now. Although I read this website because of my compulsive addiction to travel blogs I sometimes feel like the crazy old aunt who has been hanging around the young’uns too long and ought to go back to her tea and knitting.

    I’m currently living in Shanghai, but have laid down my hat in a half dozen other countries and have visited several dozen others. As a traveler, I must say, I only really took off in my 30s. In my 20s, I did the usual backpacker trails- I did my 2 year visa in the UK, I had a Eurail pass, I circled Ireland a few times, I hung out in Cape Town. It was only when I moved to Turkey in my late 20s that I got braver and made the decision that this was the life I really wanted. Before that I’d kept telling myself that I’d settle down and get a job in Canada and be a real adult. Most of my 20s felt like I was putting my ‘real life’ on hold because I was always traveling.

    Since I stopped defining ‘real life’ in such narrow terms I’ve felt much freer… and I’ve been braver, traveling further and wider than ever before without apology. It doesn’t have to end.

    Love the posts, btw.

    Reply to this comment

    • Steph

      25. Jun, 2010

      Hey Maryann,

      The title may be twenty-something travel but we need everyone here- particularly those past their twenties to give the great advice! Thanks for contributing!

      Reply to this comment

      • Farnoosh

        25. Jun, 2010

        Old Aunt? I am way into my 30s and never felt younger before, so MaryAnn, keep up that fabulous pace and excitement, and as Steph agrees, this site is for everyone. Travel knows no age discrimination, let’s not give it one :) !

        Reply to this comment

  6. Adam

    25. Jun, 2010

    Great post. I got a late start myself, at least as far as international travel. With the exception of Mexico, I didn’t leave the country until I was 27 on a 3 week trip to Europe with my now wife. While we both loved to travel before that and took annual trips, that just fueled the fire. The next thing we knew we were planning a year long RTW, which we did from October 08-October 09. Such an incredible experience. Now we’re just biding our time (here at home in St. Louis, also dreaming about seeing Lord Stanley’s Cup parade down Market Street) and trying to figure out how to get out on another long trip.

    Thanks for sharing!

    Reply to this comment

  7. Paul

    25. Jun, 2010

    People have to realize that any time is good for travel, as long as you have time and money. When you’re younger, money is the limiting factor. As you grow older, it’s time.

    Since we’re talking about backpacking here, getting over the money hurdle is relatively easy so your best chances to do a long trip are in your 20s. As you get older, get settled, move forward with a career, finding those 1+ month stretches where you can take off become increasingly harder.

    Now as you age further, health comes into the picture so while you’ll have time and money by the time you’re retired, who knows how the creaky knees and ailing hips will hold up.

    Thinking about it this way is a bit depressing but one good trip makes it all worth it :) As Scott said, life certainly does get in the way of travel.

    Reply to this comment

  8. Holgs

    25. Jun, 2010

    Well 30 is the new 20. In some ways its harder to give up a career etc to go traveling, but once you do its probably easier than not having something behind you. I only really started traveling just after I turned 28… 4 years later I don’t really see a reason to go back to my “normal” life any time soon!

    Reply to this comment

  9. MaryAnne

    26. Jun, 2010

    Thanks , both of you, for the welcome. And indeed, Farnoosh, you’re very right- travel knows no age discrimination! One thing I’ve noticed about having lived my adult life outside the box (stable job, car, mortgage, etc) is that I haven’t had to keep pace with the expectations that are usually associated with certain life stages. It’s almost as though by not agreeing to follow the straight path, you’re off the hook for the rest. I intend to keep traveling and exploring indefinitely because that is what I do!

    I wish this site had been around when I was in my 20s- back in the 90s, I felt like I was the only person who didn’t want to get stuck in one place (good job or not) forever.

    Reply to this comment

  10. Leng | Globe Nomads

    27. Jun, 2010

    I will be glad to travel no matter what my age is. There are still many people in this world that has only seen their birth place and can not afford even the cheapest of any backpacking trips. As I keep on travelling, I am contented with what I am enjoying at the moment rather than brooding about what I had missed.

    Reply to this comment

  11. Amanda

    27. Jun, 2010

    Great post! As far as I’m concerned, it doesn’t matter how or when or where you travel, as long as you get out an explore the world somehow.

    But Paul has a good point — money and time are large factors, and ones that often hamper travel dreams. I recently went to Alaska with my family on a cruise, and while it was great to see older people on the ship, I couldn’t help feeling a little bit bad for those who could barely hobble along with a cane, or those confined to wheelchairs. I’m sure they had a good time, but would they have enjoyed the Alaskan wilderness better 50 years ago?

    I feel like a lot of people plan to travel once they retire… but that doesn’t mean your body will cooperate. That’s why I’m trying to take every opportunity to hop on a plane and have an adventure now. I don’t want to have any regrets later.

    Reply to this comment

    • Steph

      28. Jun, 2010

      What you mention here is pretty much one of my main arguments for traveling while you are younger. You may not have as much money but you will almost certainly be more agile and energetic.

      Reply to this comment

  12. Monica at In Wanderment

    02. Jul, 2010

    This Louisiana girl can absolutely relate. In my 20s, like Scott, I thought that travel was a “someday” thing, and now at 29, I’m making preparations to actually do it. And I’m happy to read in his tag line that he’s a fan of New Orleans and Bloody Mary’s. Woot!

    Reply to this comment

  13. Annie Bettis

    05. Jul, 2010

    It’s really great to read other’s perspectives on the age and responsibility front. As I struggle with how “little” I’ve really seen in comparison to some of the other travelers out there, I often have this fear that all the years will slip away.

    It’s a constant struggle between the “need” to see the world and the “need” to fund it.

    I’m only 23 and I’ve set these goals of countries I have to see before I’m 30 but then I stop myself and realize that I’ll enjoy many of them just the same (if not more!!) past my 20′s!

    Best of luck with the travels Scott!! Keep getting out there!!

    Reply to this comment

    • Steph

      05. Jul, 2010

      Sometimes I really have to remind myself that life does not in fact end when you hit 30. I’m happy to be out in the world and having adventures now, but I hope that these characteristics will last me long out of my twenties!

      Reply to this comment

  14. Scott

    05. Jul, 2010

    Yeah, I think alot of the issues I was trying to write about aren’t necessarily simply due to your physical age, but the inevitable entanglements of life as the years go by, and the burden they place on plans. For example, my gf (who i hope to make my wife one day), isn’t the travel addict I am, so my RTW long-haul dreams are most likely shot forever. I have gotten over it, but it still stings.

    Scott

    Reply to this comment

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